I was just wrestling there; it was all dark.
Thinking about the next day, dreading it. Anxious of it.
I couldn’t fall asleep.
This had already been going on for a while. You might say a lifetime.
Something happens in my life, or a stressful period beckons once more = can’t sleep.
Or just repetitive thoughts of the next day going on and on, and on…
“I need to pick up the cat litter, I need to finish that blog post, oh this is a good idea for a video.”
So on and so forth.
Sometimes these were bigger themes as well. Bigger decisions, life decisions.
“Should I go with this company?”
“I’m not sure about this course, 3 months and x amount of $. Will it get me the results I desire?”
So, I once again wrestled with myself. This time it was about some past mistakes I had made. And a situation that reminded me of that.
“I hurt her. I know, I shouldn’t have done it.” I then replayed the scenario in my head with an ex. Thinking of millions of ways I could have handled it. And I still made that mistake.
Shame, guilt. All of it washed over me. Painful and annoying.
It’s as if You want to crawl away from Your own skin but can’t.
It’s still all there.
The point is = I couldn’t fall asleep if my life depended on it.
It had gone on long enough that my days had become a haze.
Productivity was dampened. Emotional outbursts and reactions were more abundant than usual.
Had to make a change.
At that time, I was still a semi-astrologer. Not really getting paid. Just a hobby. But I had already “learned some stuff”.
I went to my notes (which are heavy…) and dug up some information about the 12th house.
Two teachers of mine, Lada Duncheva and the now late Nikola Stojanovic both had talked about it. And I remembered that in that moment. A nice “ahhaa” situation.
One of the main influences or indicators of sleep is the 12th house in astrology. Mine is in Virgo.
Virgo represents = worrying, thinking, over-thinking, critical thinking, organizing, everyday routines, to-do lists, putting order into things and making it better. Among other things.
But the main one here to focus is Virgo and worry.
It hit me hard that I was constantly worrying during my sleep = Virgo in the 12th house.
At the same time, I remembered my Ascendant degree, which the great and unfortunately late Nikola Stojanovic identified as also indicator of how a person sleeps. 18 degrees = again Virgo.
I had an abundance of Virgo energy, and I was using it in all the wrong ways.
And I needed to find better ways to use “the Virgo energy”.
What did I start doing instead?
- Organizing my sleep schedule. (Virgo) Started using the Apple sleep app. Very precise times when I go to bed, and when I wake up. The app just reminds You and gives notifications. I really needed to keep up with this, harder to do than just understand intellectually! THE BODY STARTS TO GET USED TO THIS! This is one big important reason why routines work!
- Bed-time routine (again Virgo). No phones or screens after certain time (the app helps to figure that out in the beginning). For me it’s also brushing my teeth and meditation but everyday routine (Virgo). Which just means that I had to keep up with it constantly.
- If I woke up or if I still wake up during the middle of the night with a lot of thoughts or information coming in about certain Virgo topics (they are always Virgo topics for me because of the 12th house) I now get up, take out my phone (always in Airplane mode!!!) and create to-do lists and make notes (both Virgo) in the middle of the night until the information stops. And then I just go to bed again and sleep.
As You can see, these are simple things. No magical potions, no magical pills, no spells, etc. Simple but daily effort towards my goal = better sleep.
Every sign, which means every person, has their own unique way of sleeping.
Certain things they like to have in the bedroom to induce sleep.
Better to start from the Ascendant, then go for Sun and Moon for extra info.
For example, Aries native can…
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The Freedom Astrologer