Have You ever had Your friend or lover/partner (who You know is a Scorpio Ascendant, Sun, Moon, Stellium, or 8th house heavy energies) come at You with a wave of emotion that You didn’t know how to deal with?

If yes, this piece is for You.

Scorpio, the deepest of the signs has the capability to go into intense emotions and transform them. Unfortunately, it takes years of practice and dedication to get to that “mature Scorpio” space.

Which for the rest of us means (and until that maturity arrives), we are going have to deal with many emotional eruptions from them. This is a list that I believe will help You through some of these moments. I’ve gathered and tested them in real life because I’m someone who is constantly surrounded by Scorpios myself. As well as have some of that energy in a quite prominent place in my natal chart (Pluto in the 1st house by Placidus).

  1. When the eruption happens, stay as calm as possible. They are in a space where they want to drag You into their emotion. Because it’s so strong, the tendency to go for that bait is there. Under no circumstance do that. Resist with everything You have. Their emotions will rise and fall (but for Scorpios it can take a while), You have to stand in it if You are going to be in a relationship with them. Be it professional or romantic.
  2. Understand that the bulk of the reaction is coming from fear. Fear means that they are actually scared deep down. If You see them as someone in pain = it is easier to be in that observer role and not get into the drama and emotion of their “wrath”. Very often You can even see them shaking = this is another clue that they are going through trauma release or traumatic response to something that happened.
  3. Also important to point Your attention to the fact that the emotions are so strong that very often they don’t understand anything that is actually going on. I’ve had many Scorpios say to me during the fight itself “I can’t even remember why we are fighting” or even better “I don’t know why I’m so upset right now”. They have to come to that grounded space of feeling themselves, You can just be there with them, offer them the space. When they are grounded = they have tremendous capacity to go deep and unravel the origins of the trauma or emotion.
  4. If possible and they are willing, allow them privacy during or after to calm down and feel their feelings. They will then be in a place where they can express what truly happened. DON’T SHAME THEIR EMOTIONS OR FEELINGS! I have stepped on that “rake” myself, it will just escalate more and they will use Your shaming as a defense mechanism.
  5. During the actual fight, they will press on Your deepest fears and wounds. Yes, they actually do that. They want a reaction from You to pull You into their drama (childhood pattern = they will feel and experience love if You do that. I know it sounds messed up but it makes it seem like it’s their childhood environment, and it seems familiar for them, which means they feel secure, love. As well as they are replaying the childhood pattern which needs to be released) You must resist to call them names and say bad things to them. Then they got You and the situation will escalate into a full blown fight. Things can get physical, mean, abusive, just very bad. NEVER EVER PUT THEM DOWN, IT WILL JUST ESCALATE THINGS FURTHER. Your manipulation or desire to control them and end the fight like that = WILL NOT WORK!!!
  6. No matter how many times they say You did wrong but You know in Your mind, heart, and soul that You didn’t = don’t give into their manipulation. This will only keep the karmic drama going. Stand firm in Your conviction. If You know You did something wrong = admit it quickly and apologize from the heart.
  7. As much as You can = surrender to Your own emotions and feelings. This means = feel them. Then it’s easier to respond from a calm space.
  8. Don’t ask them to calm down, will escalate things further.
  9. Kiss and make up after, if romantic relationships = sex is actually good. If other = deeper intimacy can be achieved by communication and talking about what actually happened during the fight (this obviously works for romantic relationships as well). Just holding one another, also good. Emotional intimacy can very often lead to physical intimacy but don’t force it. Ask them what they need and require from You.

I wish You presence of the mind, feelings, and body in these meetings with the “wrath of Scorpio”. You are going to need it.

Ian Altosaar

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